Check whether the accessory is already connected to another phone or computer. Put it back into pairing mode, keep it near the device and try again. Remove an old pairing before reconnecting. A working second accessory helps separate a device problem from an accessory fault.
Differential
Likely causes of “Apple iPhone with Lightning Bluetooth will not pair or keeps disconnecting”, and how to tell them apart
- 1
An accessory that is off or flat
What separates it It does not appear in the list
How to confirm Charge it, switch it on and bring it close
- 2
An old pairing
What separates it It shows but will not connect
How to confirm Forget the device on the phone and pair it again
- 3
The accessory connected to another device
What separates it It does not respond
How to confirm Disconnect it from the other device or switch the other device's Bluetooth off
- 4
A car or headset with a full pairing list
What separates it Pairing fails on the accessory side
How to confirm Delete old phones from the accessory's memory
- 5
A software fault
What separates it Bluetooth grayed out or dropping
How to confirm Restart, update iOS and Reset Network Settings
Before you touch a setting
Record this first — changing settings destroys the evidence
- The accessory model
- Whether it worked before and what changed
- Whether Bluetooth is on and Airplane Mode off
- The iOS version
Try in this order
0 of 8 completedBring the accessory close and power-cycle it
ReversibleSwitch it off and on and check that it is charged.
Check Bluetooth and Airplane Mode
ReversibleSettings, Bluetooth on, Airplane Mode off.
Forget the device
ReversibleSettings, Bluetooth, the info icon, Forget This Device.
Put it into pairing mode
ReversibleFollow the accessory's instructions, then select it in the list.
Restart the phone
ReversibleHold the side and a volume button to power off and on.
Reset network settings if it persists
ReversibleSettings, General, Transfer or Reset iPhone, Reset.
Check the accessory's own firmware
ReversibleMany headphones have a companion app that updates their firmware, and an old firmware can drop connections with new iOS releases.
Test with a second accessory
ReversiblePair a different device to see whether the fault is the phone or the accessory.
Model-specific
What is true of this model and not of its siblings
- Apple iPhone XS Max will not pair or stay connected over Bluetooth
- Apple's own guidance for an accessory that will not connect has a clear order, and it solves most Bluetooth problems on an iPhone XS Max, which has Bluetooth 5.0. First, put the accessory close to the phone, switch it off and on, and make sure it is charged or powered. Second, if it was paired before, unpair it, which on the iPhone means Settings, Bluetooth, the info icon next to the accessory and Forget This Device, put it back into pairing mode and pair it again. Third, check that Bluetooth is on, that Airplane Mode is off and that the accessory is not connected to another device, since many accessories connect to only one at a time. A car stereo or headset may also hold an old pairing that needs deleting on its side. Restarting the phone helps, and a network settings reset clears stubborn cases. If a Bluetooth speaker or headset connects and the sound stutters or drops, the cause is often distance or interference, not the pairing, because Bluetooth and Wi-Fi share the 2.4 GHz band. Keep the phone and the accessory in line of sight and away from a busy router and a microwave.
- One device at a time
- Many accessories connect to one phone at a time.
- Both sides
- A car or headset can hold the stale pairing.
- Audio route
- During a call, iOS picks one audio route; if it picks the wrong accessory, switch it in Control Center from the audio card.
- Pairing limits
- Some headsets remember only a few phones, and a full list blocks a new pairing until you delete one.
Stop boundary
When this stops being a self-service repair
- !If Bluetooth is grayed out after a network reset, book Apple service
- !If only one accessory fails, ask its maker
- !A car stereo that will not pair may need its own reset
Evidence ledger
Sources behind this answer
Exact questions
Common questions
Why won't my iPhone find my Bluetooth device?+
The accessory may be off, flat, in use elsewhere or in the wrong mode.
Which Bluetooth version does the XS Max have?+
Bluetooth 5.0.
Should I forget the device?+
Yes, if it worked before.
Does a reset delete my data?+
Network reset does not.
Why does my Bluetooth sound stutter?+
Distance, interference or a low battery in the accessory.
Can I pair two devices at once?+
Only if the accessory supports multipoint connections.
bluetooth: model differences
Also covered: Apple iPhone 14 family; Apple iPhone 13 family; Apple iPhone 12 family; Apple iPhone 11 family; Apple iPhone XS family.